And more than that…
Do I love my body anywhere close to as much as I love these baby feet?
Do I talk to myself the way I talk to her?
Do I believe in myself the way I believe in her?
Do I cheer for myself the way I cheer for her?
Here’s an example. Last week she rolled over for the very first time. She has been trying for weeks and she failed a ton of times before she finally succeeded. From her very first tummy time we have gathered around her, encouraged her, and given her hints and tips.
“You can do it!”
“Pull up that little foot!”
“Just a little bit farther!”
“You’re almost there!”
“Go baby Go!”
I cannot remember the last time I gave myself that kind of encouragement and support. My inner narrative usually sounds like:
“It took you forever to do one little thing.”
“How are you still making the same dumb mistakes?”
“You made this mess.”
“You are letting everyone down.”
Oh my friends, would we ever, EVER talk to the owner of those tiny feet that way?
No Way. Not if she failed a million billion bajillion times.
But I do it to myself every single day.
So…this year I am going to treat myself the way I treat the people I love.
I am going to:
love myself,
cheer for myself,
believe in myself,
forgive myself, and
I am going to start by being nice to myself.
This is a change I can embrace without worrying about immediate success or failure. It takes no special skills, no new memberships, and only a little discipline.
Would you like to join me? Here’s how I am going to start:
1. Find something good to say about yourself every day.
2. Notice the negative thoughts you have about yourself and replace them with encouraging ones.
3. If baby feet do not make you mushy, find something that does and put the picture on your phone screen, in your car, or on your mirror where you will be reminded how you want to feel about yourself every day.
Ok friends. This is going to take some practice. Let’s expect trial and error. Let’s expect to fail a million billion bajillion times before we get good at this. But remember:
“We can do this!”
“Go baby Go!”
I can guide you as you lead your family through conflict and uncertainty. I will help you find joy in an imperfect and messy life.
Baby feet make me mushy, too! And you’re so right. Sometimes I have to practice self love like I would practice learning an instrument or a new language. We have to literally change the way our brains think about ourselves and that is essentially learning a new language. I’m with ya!